Recognizing and Healing from Prolonged Grief Disorder

Grief is a natural response to loss—it reshapes the landscape of our lives, demanding time, space, and care. But what happens when grief doesn’t ease, when it lingers like a heavy fog that won’t lift? For some, loss feels impossible to move through, and instead of gradually softening, it stays sharp and consuming.

This is known as Prolonged Grief Disorder (PGD)—a form of grief that remains intense, interfering with daily life long after the expected mourning period. It’s not that grief has a deadline, but when the pain remains all-consuming, it can become something that holds you back rather than something you integrate.

If you’ve been feeling stuck in grief, unable to move forward, you are not alone. Let’s talk about what prolonged grief looks like and how healing is possible.

How Do You Know If You’re Experiencing Prolonged Grief?

Grief doesn’t have a timeline, and there’s no “right” way to mourn. However, prolonged grief often shows up as:

• Persistent, intense longing or preoccupation with the person who has passed (or with the circumstances of the loss).

• Feeling like life has stopped—like you’re going through the motions but not fully living.

• Difficulty engaging with the present or imagining a future without the person or thing you lost.

• Avoiding reminders of the loss or, conversely, feeling unable to focus on anything else.

• Deep guilt or shame—feeling like you should have done more, or even questioning your right to heal.

• A sense of meaninglessness—feeling like life no longer holds purpose without your loved one.

• Emotional numbness or isolation, even from people who care about you.

If grief has taken over your life in these ways for a year or more (six months for children and teens), it may be prolonged grief disorder. It’s important to note that this isn’t about grieving “wrong”—it’s about recognizing when grief has become too heavy to carry alone.

Why Does Grief Get Stuck?

Grief lingers for many reasons. Sometimes, the loss itself was traumatic or unexpected, leaving little space to process it. Other times, past wounds—such as childhood neglect, unresolved trauma, or a history of complicated relationships—can make it harder to navigate loss.

Many people also struggle with cultural or societal expectations around grief. Messages like “you should be over it by now” or “just focus on the good memories” can make healing even harder, leading to guilt or shame about still feeling the weight of the loss.

Finding a Path Forward

Healing from prolonged grief doesn’t mean forgetting your loved one or pretending the loss didn’t happen. It means finding a way to carry your love for them without being consumed by the pain.

Here’s where to start:

1. Acknowledge That Healing Doesn’t Mean Letting Go

One of the biggest fears with grief is that healing means forgetting—but that’s not the case. Healing means making space for both the love and the loss, allowing yourself to move forward while still holding onto the connection in a way that honors your journey.

2. Allow Yourself to Feel—Without Judgment

There’s no “should” when it comes to emotions. If you’re still grieving deeply, that’s okay. If you feel numb, that’s okay too. What matters is giving yourself permission to feel what’s there, without guilt or pressure.

3. Reconnect with Life, One Small Step at a Time

Grief can make the world feel distant or meaningless. Try starting small—reaching out to a friend, engaging in an activity you once enjoyed, or even just stepping outside for fresh air. Healing happens in small moments of reconnection.

4. Find Ways to Honor Your Loss in a Meaningful Way

Sometimes, grief lingers because we haven’t had a chance to process or express it fully. Consider finding ways to honor your loss—writing a letter, creating a ritual, planting a tree, or sharing stories about your loved one.

5. Seek Support When You Need It

Grief is not meant to be carried alone. If your grief feels like a weight that won’t lift, talking with a therapist can help you process the pain and find a way forward.

At Curious Mind Counseling, we understand that grief is complex and deeply personal. If you’re struggling with prolonged grief, you don’t have to navigate it alone. We offer a safe, compassionate space to help you move through your grief at your own pace—without judgment, without expectations, and always with care.

If you’re ready to take the next step, reach out. Healing doesn’t mean leaving your loved one behind—it means learning to carry them with you in a way that allows you to keep living.